Spot On. Spot Off!

Monday, September 15, 2014

My Lips' Best Friend and my Face's New Enemy!

I keep losing my Chapstick Original so I ventured to Wal-Mart to buy a few more lip moisturizer to stash in my room and purse. It took me 20 minutes to find the right product for my lips partly because I did not know where the pharmacy section was (new Wal-Mart nearby), and partly because I was distracted by the other beauty products on display. I compared ingredients, cost, and amount. Conclusion: Vaseline Lip Therapy in a tube is the WINNER!

Why is Vaseline Lip Therapy the winner? Because
1. Cost: .92 cents for...
2. 10g of product in a tube with...
3. the least amount of ingredients: 100% white petroleum and flavor

COMPARED TO
Chapstick Original with SPF 12 protection
1. 3 pack for $2.94 which is 1 stick/.98 cents
2. only 4g of product in a stick
3. has other ingredients that may irritate my skin

The cause of my upper lip allergy and perhaps the random psoriasis spots on my face: very expensive Laneige products!
All four I bought for approx $150.00 at Amore, a reputable Korean beauty shop at H-Mart. I have been using the products for less than a year on and off and never had reactions until April. On April of this year, I developed dry and crusty upper lip skin which I thought was due to my 3-day trip with no clean water and stress. I tested the products twice again this month, and they yielded unforgivable results. My upper lip felt a burning sensation, showed redness, and developed white and yellow crust.

Lip therapy to the rescue! As you can see, I have the "burns" on my upper lip. Vaseline Lip Therapy calmed the irritation. I applied it last night multiple times and the last time I moisturized was at 10PM last night. 10 hours later, smooth and calm but still red. I am expecting the irritation will disappear by Wednesday of this week.

On another note, I will continue using the Chapstick Original because it is still usable. I have one that is unopened and the other I can use for backup in my purse. I have plans for the empty stick after. I will update when it comes.

Peace .<

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

the answer

I have grown resentment towards my parents.

Saturday, August 9, 2014

In a nutshell...

So I am back. In a nutshell, nothing has changed much.
Even though I graduated, received my ARRT certification, psoriasis spots fading away, nothing has changed much inside.

I feel as lonely as ever.
This blog was solely created for my period of frustration pertaining to my skin problems, but I think I will merge another topic in this blog that influences the flare of psoriasis: emotional stress.

I know this blog does not get many views from around the world, and I know I will someday delete this entry when I feel like it (I hope not).

I feel lonely because I have been in a long distance relationship for almost two years now. We have "known" each other since May of 2012 but did not officiate our exclusive relationship status until November 24th, 2012. I have to admit that sometimes I forget to greet him "Happy Monthsary" as I think he does, too. This forgetfulness started late 2013 and our monthsary just faded into oblivion.

I do not question myself if this is true love or not. I know I am in love with him and I love him. I cannot possibly be without him. I have grown dependent on this man whom I have mostly in contact through web chats and BBM messages. Every waking hour is him in my mind.

I made so many promises that I am drowning in them because I do not think I will be ever to follow through. I am nearing my 25th birthday without any success in moving away from my parents.

I appreciate my parents' generosity by providing me with food, shelter, and transportation. But they can not seem to let me go. I think the only way to break this is to actually just move out one day. Discussions with them are useless. I am still stuck.

I already packed and have the ticket to board the bus this Tuesday. I have a very sick feeling about this. My life is going to unravel. The shell will be broken and I need to decide whether to stay with my parents, or to stay with Him.

I have been thinking that this August trip to visit him will be my last physical encounter with him. I will ask him if he is willing to wait for me for another two more years, and clearly, I know he will break the relationship off one day because he can find another woman closer to his current residence with no added baggage.

I am ready for when he leaves me. He is the best man I have ever met. Though we argue a lot, we learned to discuss our problems and find solution. We learned a lot about ourselves.

Dear Thomas,

I am sorry. We will make the best of our time together in August.

^and that makes me very sad already because I am not sure if I will be able to see him this August. My parents are preventing me. I assured my parents that his family are very welcoming. They have visited me before in Chicago. My parents are worried about the "devil" and he will ruin me. I know myself better than the devil. If he kills me during the process, let it be. But he cannot kill my determination to be with this man and to destroy our future and my family's future. This fear that my parents are talking about are based on their experience growing up and finding love. I understand as my mom was 9 years older than my dad. My brother and I were illegitimate children. My paternal grandparents' were okay with the consequences (read: illegitimate children), but my maternal grandparent and relatives were not, as usual.

I understand. But somehow I just need to get out. I know I will get a stable job and I know I will be stable financially. I do not know what my parents are waiting for because I am capable of surviving this world if they just learn to let me go...

Friday, November 1, 2013

New

I will be posting update pictures on my Google + wall. With my schedule this year and next year, I do not have enough time to think and to type a paragraph or two about my psoriasis. So please check out my Google+ profile instead for quick updates!

=)

Sunday, September 29, 2013

Update September 29th, 2013

Good morning, everyone!

As we all know, summer has ended which means it is also the end of our sunbathing days.

I have four remaining probiotic capsules and I will be finishing them up this week. I will continue taking vitamin D capsules because I know I will not get enough sun time for this semester and next semester--almost 7 months altogether The only sun time I will receive is when I drive for an hour and a half in Chicago's busy I-90 on my way to work. Even that does not do much because my hands and chin are the only areas the sun is able to reach.

I have GREAT news and some bad news. I will begin with delivering the bad news...

I developed psoriasis on my armpits. The right armpit is worse than the left armpit. The areas are not scaly, but red and sore. The irritation looks more like dark purple, so my armpits are dark compared to my fair complexion :'(

I shave frequently so that my hairs do not irritate my skin (Schick Quattro for women with moisturizing strip and Schick shaving cream are very gentle on my skin). I use Dove soap and lather up whenever I wash up twice a day. I do not use deodorant unless I know I am going to do some vigorous workout which will demand my body to sweat.

As of now, my underarms are a lot better now than they were three weeks ago. I had would scratch them every hour of every day.

I will post pictures of that area once I muster up the courage to show the world my underarm. It is embarrassing, but I just hold my head up high.

Monday, August 12, 2013

Positively Psoulful

At 18, I was on top of the world. I was a recent high school graduate with a two-year scholarship at a community college taking 18 credit hours of classes per semester along with a part-time job, and a principal role at a collegiate level. I was loving life. Motivated, driven, and determined.

After my trip to the Philippines in 2006, I developed minor dry scalp. My mood had changed upon entering junior year. I was stressed with scholarship applications, college decisions, ACT exam, projects, teachers, Orchesis...the dry scalp did not hinder me from achieving my goals. Even when I entered college, I was still moody yet reluctant to slow down, until I developed low tolerance to psoriasis. With psoriasis, I noticed a series of deficiencies. I was insecure and self-loathing. I was at the pinnacle of my life one year, and the next, I was at a pitiful grave. Finally, after months of self-diagnosing and unsuccessful attempts of self-healing, I realized I had to do something to escape the dark, and lonely place I dug myself. In 2009, I was clinically diagnosed with guttate psoriasis, a chronic autoimmune disease that damage the joints and skin.

I know there is a stark difference between now and the past. I look for ways to make myself feel better everyday, and I have such a strong network of support from family and friends. I hope you can find that space in your mind and heart that you are beautiful/handsome and that you are valuable and loved. Peace .<